Double Tap

Those familiar with zombie movies will get the immediate reference of the title.  In the movie, Zombieland, Zombie hunter, Tallahassee, played by Woody Harrelson, says “You gotta do a double tap! If you don’t, they get up and bite ya!”

When shot in the chest with a sawed off shot gun, Zombies may fall to the ground. But if you don’t take the time to put one good blast in their heads, they will rise up and bite you from behind… or in the behind.

Our powder room toilet tank has a push button, which needs a double tap every time you flush.  If you flush just pushing it hard once, the plunger in the tank sticks. Then it continues running just a little bit until the next time you open the lid… to discover it’s still running.  In a country where water is desalinated from sea water, this is tantamount to a grievous sin.  Aside from the theological state of the affair, it’s expensive.  Letting water run is very costly.

We also have a toilet in our bathroom upstairs.  Just before the company, which owned the house when we started to rent it, sold the house to us, they sent a bunch of workmen and painters around to fix and paint things.  A plumber put a new tank above our old toilet.  Too bad for him he dropped the old throne on the tile floor and it broke into a million shards (no joke!).  So, he had to replace the throne too.

The new tank on the bathroom toilet is actually about the cheapest tank you can buy at the hardware store.  It has, though, a two stage push button mechanism.  When you push the front button, the water starts to flush.  If you push the second button, which says STOP, it stops the flow of water, saving water.

We had two German girls, who rented a room from us one year.  They were exchange students.  They seemed to do nothing, but drink and evacuate their bladders.  They were hard on the poor, cheap toilet.  They managed to bang on the flush button so hard and so often, the water ran constantly. The plunger inside just wouldn’t seat and stop the flow of water.

It took me a year to get up the courage to try and fix it.  I managed somehow to turn some screw the right way and go it to actually stop running.  The downside is that it takes a half an hour now to fill…

However, it also still needs a double tap… Sometimes the STOP button gets stuck and then the water… flows endlessly, until someone comes in and notices it.

I won’t do a Žižekian analysis of toilet tanks, as he did of toilet bowls, but we do have German Observation Deck toilets.  So, you can tell if you’re healthy or not (or whether a Zombie got you when you weren’t looking).

When I was a kid I would visit with my Grandmother Gottschalk, Bertha Jane Gottschalk (nee Simmons).  Grandma was a force of nature.  She was one of the original women’s libbers, though she didn’t know it, I think.  Grandma was a Second Grade Elementary School teacher for 50 years, really I’m not kidding 50 years.

I loved Grandma and Grandma loved me, but she was always fierce.  She has a “look” of disdain and disappointment that could freeze the seven year old heart.

Despite her gruff exterior, she had a heart of gold.  Many of her former students continued to write to her even into her retirement.  They loved her.

Still Grandma was “old school”.  She took no prisoners.  She had a right way for everything.

She was known (I witnessed it) to say to the sports announcer of the New York Mets (of course she was watching TV and talking to the screen), “I taught you better than that! Between you and I! Imagine!”  There was no slang or bad grammar in Grandma’s house.  Our favorite game (at least mine) was some version of Scrabble.  

Grandma used to take us to town to shop or to church or to the museum on the “street car” (tram) or by bus.  Before we left she would always say, “Did you go to the bathroom?” Of course, I hadn’t. So, I’d go up the stairs to the bathroom. (Grandma wasn’t having any extra money spent to put in a second powder room on the ground floor.) After I was about half way down the stairs, she would ask, “Did you ‘jiggle’ the handle?” (That is, did I shake the handle of the toilet to make sure the plunger had seated, and the water had stopped running.

Grandma was both a first wave feminist and a Depression Era survivor.  There was no waste in Grandma’s house.  She was not about to pay for water running pointlessly.  She was also not going to waste money on a plumber, who would come and charge a lot of money, when the result would be that the plunger would still stick.  And so, you had to “jiggle” the handle.

So, “double tapping” the button on our powder room toilet is second nature to me.  It’s part of life.  Old things are quirky and you learn to deal with it.  You humor old things so that they do what they should.

Not that I am an old thing, but I hope that people will “double tap” me… That didn’t come out right. I mean humor me and put up with me.

At least I didn’t do a Žižekian phenomenological analysis of excrement! ;-) Beware that if you do look up Žižek’s phenomenological analysis of excrement, he is a European, who has no problem with saying the “S” word.  Europeans, even godly Dutch people, have no problem with say the “S” word.  It’s like Americans saying manure.

Just a hunk a junk

Long ago in a far-away land… (“Tamo daleko, daleko od mora…”)

We actually it was in Belgrade, then the capital of the Union of Federated Socialist Republics of Yugoslavia, in about 1986.  I wanted to buy a short-wave radio.  I was also looking for a cassette tape player. (No Millenial better say, “A what player?”)

There was a Philips store in Belgrade, or at least one that had Philips brand products.  I didn’t want to buy a lesser brand, though I doubt there was a lesser brank that had what I wanted.

I saw the radio in the picture above in the display window.  It was new and shiny.  For its day, it was high-tech electronics.

I told the clerk that I wanted to buy it.  He looked at me as if I had lost my mind. “Why do you want to buy it here?  You could buy it in Vienna for half the cost.  The taxes double the cost!”

I told him I would likely have to pay the taxes at the border, if I imported it.  Besides, I said, I want to help the country I am in.

He shrugged and wrote up the receipt.  I paid at the cashier and returned for my parcel.

I’ve been using that radio since 1986.  Unfortunately, somewhat like myself, some functions don’t work as they did or should.  At some point the cassette tape player quit.  From experience with other cassette players, I realize that the bands, which move the spindles, wear out.  I replaced the motor and bands in a “boom box” I had, after I spent a lot of time finding the motor, and then taking it to the repairman.  He did the repair, though he said it would likely not last more than a year.  He said I should just buy a new radio/ cassette player.  He was right…

Anyway, the Philips radio can still play AM, FM, MW and short-wave (several bands).  Over time, however, somethings became obsolete.  There are still some AM stations, but they are fewer.  BBC dropped its AM station in NL.  FM still plays fine, though it’s always a trick to get the antenna to stay where it ought to be; it seems to need an infusion of something to stay up; Viagra for antennas?

There are also some Middle Wave (MW) stations, but again they aren’t of interest to me or don’t come in well.  Short-wave radio used to be the only way, besides records LPs / vinyls or cassette tapes to hear a foreign language; in my case Russian while in college.  There still is a Radio Moscow and a Radio Bejiing.  There are some stations from Arabic speaking places, etc.  But short-wave is largely dead due to the innovation of the internet.  Anyone anywhere who has an internet connection (and there’s no government restrictions or “jamming”) can listen to probably every language known to man. 

Still my radio has its place in the house: on the cabinet where we keep our toiletries in the bathroom.  It plays either nice classical music or rock music on some one or other FM station.  I don’t have patience to try to tune in short wave anymore.

Sometimes I feel like my old radio looks, a fossil from another age.  My paint is worn off and some functions don’t work like they should.

But I have my function too.  I do what I can.

I used to think the race was to the swift and the strong.  Now I know that the race is to the dogged and determined.

Pittsburghers like to refer to themselves as Pluggers.  You “plug along”.  I’m not sure of the origin of the phrase, maybe a steam train, the “Little Engine that Could”?

I realize as I get older that it’s not the fantastic things you do that are the most important.  Most intelligent people with determination, will and opportunity can finish a PhD.  It’s an achievement to celebrate, but it’s not the be all and end all of life.

I tell my students every year, several times a year, that I don’t want to hear anyone tell me that they are Spirit-filled. if they do not show Christ-like character in how they treat others.  I don’t think Jesus or Paul cared much about experiences.

Experiences are great and may determine many things for us, like God’s call to mission in our lives.  However, what Paul judges a person by is their character, not their spiritual gifts, particularly not the flashy ones. “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control.” Galatians 5:22

The older I get the more I think about how basic machinery lasts longer than dashpots and “brain boxes”.  Old Soviet era cars may not be lovely, but they can be repaired, and they can last twenty years.  The US Space Shuttle program has ended, but the Soviet Soyuz rockets and capsules still go to the International Space Station.

We like flashy, new technology.  We read the latest books.  But sometimes the old model is just what we need for a certain function… and the old Book is the best.

Letter to a friend about living together

Dear Nichole,

It's so sad for Joyce and even for Kevin [that he is involved with another woman and yet says he still has feelings for Joyce].  He seems to think feeling equals loving.  Feeling can be a part of loving, but loving biblically is making a decision to do what is best for the other person.  

Love is putting the other's needs above you own.  With regards to the husband and wife, it means mutual submission. Ephesians 5:21 ought to be the start to the paragraph [about marital relations in Paul’s letter to the Ephesians], not the end of the last paragraph. Ephesians 5:22 [should not] start out as if it is a new thought.  Ephesians 5:22 has no verb.  The verb “submit” is in Ephesians 5:21 and it is assumed as the verb in Ephesians 5:22. So, all people in the church ought to be submitting to each other, and within the marriage the wife is reminded to submit. (In the view of some commentators, since the Fall the woman wants to control and supplant the husband.)  The husband is given a very difficult and really impossible command to love [his wife] as Christ loved the church (agape NT love, not eros Gk desire or "love" or fileo friendship). [Christ] died for the church.  

Synonyms for love are a bit difficult in the Bible, since they are sometimes used synonymously, "’Peter, do you agape me?’ ‘Lord, you know that I fileo you.’"  Repeated twice.  The third time, Jesus asks Peter using files.  Why didn't Peter answer using agapeo  the first two times? Embarrassment? Peter had denied Christ? Perhaps Peter didn't want to admit agapeo? It would have been too hard?

I think Linda's right to a point, if someone doesn't recognize the authority of the Bible, then they won't accept what it says.  On the other hand, you could make what's called a Natural Law argument.  Thomas Aquinas argued that there are certain natural principles or laws in creation.  As God has created the world, there is a certain way things are in the world. [Whether anyone accepts that they exist or have any influence over them doesn’t change that they exist and have influence over them.  At the same time those who resist biblical teaching may be able to see that these Natural Law principles exist when they would be unwilling to accept the Bible.]

Almost all mammals have [pairs of] males and females, and copulate to produce offspring.  There is no reproduction of offspring without pairing. The morphology of mammals as regards sexual organs is amazingly similar. Some animals are even monogamous or monandrous (one wife or one male).  It's true that some mammals like cattle or lions have herds and prides, in which one male has dominance and breeding rights.  However, other like elephants breed for life to one mate.

It seems that God has so designed the world that monogamous or monadrous marriage is the norm for humans.  This would seem to be obvious from millenia of marriage practices across cultures.

In the end, though, young people today are very confused by a non-Christian media industry that has pushed alternative forms of marriage and sexual relationships.  If George cheated on Sally, I bet she'd "kick him to the curb."  I have had students tell me that they know people whose idea of marriage is open marriage, like Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn (or as in the "Friends with benefits" movie).  However, who is going to help you when you're sick, if it's only about sexual satisfaction?  Who will care for you when you're old? [Marriage is mutual concern and caring, i.e. real loving.]

Ordinary marriage is also a civil contract.  Do you share things in common?  Do you need a prenuptial agreement? If you live together, what happens if many years or decades later you split and you own common property like a home?  In many states, there is common law marriage.  If you have lived together long enough, say seven years, you are considered married by the law.  This means your children aren't "illegitimate", i.e. they can inherit property. It also means that the surviving "spouse" can inherit joint assets.

None of this will seem too important until there are children involved or someone is chronically sick or property is involved.  Love is supposed to conquer all.  However, if love is just feelings, they come and go.  "Commitment" - “What I'm lookin' for
Is a love that's forever” as the song goes.

I guess Sally doesn't see the need for any more commitment than George's love and word.  Biblically in the OT it seems that if a man sleeps with a virgin, she is his wife.  She could not marry anyone else. She was "used". (Her hymen would be broken.) In some sense in biblical terms having sex is getting married (if you weren't already; then it would be adultery).

The situation is different now.  No one seems to understand that sex is metaphysical.  It's not just about saying words, which could be said without intent or loveless commitment (no feelings).  When two people join sexually, they become one.  It's something much deeper than a casual contact of genitalia.

Perhaps it's good now that there is no "double standard". i.e. that men may cheat and be sexually active outside of marriage, but women can't.  On the other hand, the open relationships practiced by many or perhaps even most now lead to heart ache and a lot of confusion.  The answer to divorce is not open relationships.  It's more love, more agape. 1 Corinthians 13.

I don't think it does any good to try to force people to listen to you or the Bible or to agree with you.  Your discomfort at their choices is probably louder than their concern for the issue.

We have seen a lot of people live together for a while and then get married.  Some don't, but usually indirect teaching by example and patient love for your spouse says more than words.  We have also seen many couples start to come to church when they have Sunday School aged kids.  Sometimes the parents come to Christ at that time!  Patience in such situations is hard and the question of what to say when is very difficult.  Try to be patient with them and just have fun.  Be yourself in your relationship with Richard [her husband] and vice versa. Pushing them to do what you think it right will probably only meet with a stubborn resistance.

Praying for you all.

Love,

Phil